Keeping Secrets

SHE SAID:

Okay, I think we've found a woman's weakness. (Finally, sheesh)

So a woman has a harder time keeping a secret... well, secret. I place the blame squarely where it belongs: On men. Yes, you just read that right. I blame men! If men were better communicators, women wouldn't have to talk so much. It's like we have to do the talking for ourselves, our kids, and for our man. And sometimes that talking can lead to spilling things that wouldn't normally be spilled.... like secrets.

And for the men out there that think it's possible for a woman to keep a secret -- you are wrong. She has told at minimum two other people. Most likely the people that she told the secret to don't count because it was "out of necessity" or it's because it was her brother or sister or best friend... and we don't keep secrets from them. That's what separates the best friend from other friends and acquaintances -- secrets. Friends don't know your secrets, best friends do.

So the next time you have a secret, you better keep it ... well, secret!

He Said:

A husband looking through the paper came upon a study that said women use more words than men.
Excited to prove to his wife that he had been right all along when he accused her of talking too much, he showed her the study results. It read "Men use about 15,000 words per day, but women use 30,000".
The wife thought for a while, then finally she said to her husband "It's because we have to repeat everything we say."
The husband said "What?"

So how does this all apply to secrets? Let's look at the numbers in the joke. I did some research and couldn't come up with any factual evidence for the 15,000 and 30,000. But I did find some research where men and women wore recorders for two days and the words were counted. Yes, women talk more than men. In that research men averaged just under 6,000 words per day where women were around 9,000. When you have that many words to use how can you keep anything a secret.

I tried to say 9,000 words one day. I ended up losing my voice for two days. It seems men are allotted a certain amount, then we are shut down for repairs.

But how can you put the blame on men? We aren't "bad" communicators, we just aren't programmed to talk as much as women. And frankly we really aren't dying to hear your secrets.

You know the old adage, "Some things are better left unsaid."? It's good advice. That's why we call them secrets.

In closing, all my research led me to develop this philosophy: When you are speaking to someone and about to divulge a secret, it can only mean that you have run out of things to talk about that day, but still have plenty of words to go to reach your allotment.