Moping

SHE SAID:

We are counting the days until the newest member of the family joins us! I had an ultrasound the other day at my doctor's office so they could check the size of the baby and make sure everything looks good. I am not sure if my doctor does this as part of regular routine, or if he did this time because my last one was a gigantor baby .. (9lbs) Whatever the case, we got to see the baby I have affectionately nicknamed "Junior". At first she had the machine turned towards her and only her and Tony could see the screen. Me watching his face watching the ultrasound did something to me. While it could very well be the hormones turning me into a big pile of mush right now, it was a very soft, sweet moment. Men don't often show their emotions or like to talk about them, even, so to actually witness it was kinda cool.

Kids can break your heart from day negative 9 months it seems. They don't mean to.. it's just part of it. The hardest part for me is when my boys go to visit their dad in Missouri. The trip is about 9 hours and all I can think about when they are gone is the fastest route and mode of transportation to reach them if they need me. Every Thanksgiving, every Christmas, Spring Break, half of summer vacation they spend with their dad. Tony and I were completely alone last Christmas. We were lamenting on the irony of the situation to each other. We found it strange to have a house slap full of people on every other day of the year ... And I don't think you ever get used to it. I think you learn to live with it.

And when I am moping around the house, looking lost, it's kind of nice to look up and have someone there holding up 2 bowls of ice cream asking, "which one do you want" ...

This weekend is Tony's turn to mope around the house, missing his boys. My turn to serve up the ice cream. Which flavor sounds good to you, Dear?


HE SAID:

You can make fun of me all you want. But let me tell you how it is.

Every weekend, and much of the week my boys are around. I've coached their baseball for years and this spring I'm coaching Denver's soccer team. So here I have a weekend with no work plans, and my ex decides to take them on vacation. I should be rejoicing at the idea. Right?

Funny how all of a sudden you don't mind your tools being left out in the yard, or all your nails and screws being used to build a fort out of your good lumber, or fingers being stuck in the jello. Yeah. All weekend all I could do was think about all the things we could be doing, while I cleaned up the yard and mowed the grass.

But of course I do feel bad for the two boys that were here in the house this weekend, and Maria. I am sure I haven't been the most pleasant person to be around. But my boys will be back soon and we should be back to normal.

Mint chocolate chip will do just fine.