Unemployment bliss

SHE SAID:

Well, today was my first official day unemployed this year. I'm really trying not to freak out. And it's only day one, so the freaking out was extremely minimal. I only hit my "panic mode" twice. Ok, three times. But that was it. I was prepared for my job ending, I knew what was going on. And, really, three weeks to go before baby comes, I am a teeny tiny bit relieved to have the little bit of rest before junior comes along. Well, as much rest as a mom can hope for, anyway, right?

The freaking out part is just my nature. I don't know if it's a personality trait or a womanly trait or what, but I do freak out. I freak out a lot. Most of the time I can contain the freaking out in my own head and calm myself down and no one is the wiser ... but, sometimes it comes out and lands on everyone around me like vomit that falls like rain from the heavens above. I seem to find myself freaking out a lot this past year, too. All the changes in my life that just seem to be beyond my control. I feel like someone took my life and hit the autopilot button and forgot to tell me about it. And Tony just sits back and tells me not to worry about it. If he were Italian, he's be saying "fuggedabouddit" and sit back and take another puff of his cigar and blow smoke rings out of his mouth. I swear he would. And, fortunately, he is right about 90 to 95% of the time. It kills me that he is so darn relaxed about things while I'm in a tizzy. I worry, freak, and panic over what turns out to be nothing.

So, this whole unemployed thing: I'm going to try my hardest and take it easy for once in my life and not worry about things. I'm going to concentrate on finishing out this pregnancy and having some fun with the boys and I won't freak out that I don't have a job just yet. I have to allow myself to get out of my single mom way of thinking and realize that things might just be ok for once, even if I am not the captain of the ship.

I tell you what. It would be so much easier not to think about my unemployed status if I had a big bowl of mint chocolate chip ... hint hint, Pookie ...


HE SAID:

You know... about that cigar. I did this little experiment with a Real Cuban Cohiba, and one made in the Dominican Republic... And let me tell you, that Cuban was truly a step above its counterpart. But you don't really give a damn about that, do you. I think everyone should really learn how to relax with a good cigar. It's good for the heart. Honest.

I'm really not going to get my panties in a bunch every time someone pisses on my shoe. What good will it do? I still have piss all over my shoe and what, do I need my blood pressure up too? And you know what happens eventually? Hmm? That's right. The piss dries and if you didn't vomit all over everyone eventually it'll be forgotten about. Now if someone craps on your shoe...

Unemployment. There's two ways of looking at it.

1) You've lost your job and OMG what are you going to do.

or

2) You now have plenty of time to pursue what you really want to do with your life.

Seriously folks, you can hear about this every other day on Dr. Phil. Do I really need to go over this here?
No I've never been "job scared" in fact I have rarely worked for anyone for more than 2 years in one stint. Most of my life I've been self employed. I know this isn't for everyone. But if you're willing and able, even in this economy there's plenty of jobs to be had. Truthfully the worse the economy gets the more work I have. Go figure.

And baby if you hid your icecream a little better I wouldn't find it...